I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
