how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
