the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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