they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
