Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Randomize
