why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Randomize