god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
are you so shy because you have an std?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Randomize
