I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
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im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
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Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?