Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Randomize