yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
We are two peas in an std pod
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize