just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Randomize
