i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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