I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
