Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
