Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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