I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
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