I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Can I color on your dick again?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Randomize
