Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize