Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
