Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
found the other keg... it's in the tree
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
