so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Randomize
