So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
