Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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