Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
