you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
