The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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