I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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