there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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