Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
