I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
operation have a gay friend backfired
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
