if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
This toilet bowl is my home.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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