oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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