do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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