remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
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