He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Quick, to the slutcave!
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
