So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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