She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
