Well douche your snatch and let's go!
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
