yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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