I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize