If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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