Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
