PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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