Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
