they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize