Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
