i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
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