i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
