she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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