Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
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